After the Funeral

After a funeral, most people will arrange a reception gathering for guests to go to. This event is designed to enable the deceased’s loved ones to have chance to discuss happy memories, and offer their condolences to one another.

What Happens at a Wake?

Usually held straight after the main funeral service, a wake is often held either in the home of the deceased’s family, or in a local venue such as a pub or village hall.

Food & Drink

Depending on the location and number of guests who will be attending the wake, you may wish to serve some refreshments. In the UK, you’ll commonly find a buffet of finger food such as sandwiches and quiche; however it’s possible to be as unique as preferred. In the event of a small group, a sit-down meal may be appropriate. Or you could use this opportunity to celebrate the deceased’s preferences; for example, if they were especially fond of fish and chips, this could be served to their friends and family at the reception.

Who gets invited to the wake?

A wake is usually open to any of the deceased’s friends and family. Usually those who attend the funeral service will also go to the wake, however it can also be a helpful solution should someone be unable to attend the funeral. Some people ask that small children do not attend the funeral, but they are welcomed at the wake afterwards. Also, in the event that the funeral is held at a small venue which cannot accommodate all the guests you wish to invite, a wake at a larger venue can offer them the chance to be a part of the day. Attendees can entirely depend on personal preference.

How long does a wake go on for?

Again, this is up to the individual. In the event that you have rented a venue, there may be time constraints in place, otherwise – if the reception is held at someone’s house – it might continue on into the evening. There is no right or wrong amount of time to stay at a wake, simply do what feels right.

Is there entertainment at a wake?

There is sometimes entertainment at a wake, which might be dictated by tradition and culture. In the UK, it is becoming quite popular to show photo slideshows or home-movie clips at wakes. It is also common to find music being played, with many opting to bring some CDs or a playlist of the deceased’s favourite songs.

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A Few Kind Words...

“Dear Fran
I just wanted to drop you an email to thank you for all your care and support in the arrangements for my dad, John.
I know that my Mum, Valerie, was most grateful for your support and care, particularly last Friday which was a difficult day for her. Mum said to me that you went over and above in her eyes, making sure she was ok before you would let her leave.
Dad would have highly approved of the day yesterday, and that’s all we could have asked for. It really was the celebration of his life that he would have wanted.
Again, my sincerest thanks and gratitude to you all.”

Helena

“Thank you so much for the care, support, compassion and understanding you showed with helping Chris and us to plan his funeral. You made a very difficult time for us more bearable for which we are very grateful. Thank you also for enabling all Chris’s plans to come to fruition. His ‘send-off’ was exactly what he wanted. Malcolm did a brilliant job too. Thank you, Jane, With love and sincere, thank you.”

Kathy, Samantha, Rosie and all the Sayer Family

“I would like to say a huge thank you to both Carina at Alan Greenwood and Sons in Frimley and the Celebrant. When my mother-in-law passed, we had absolutely no idea what we were doing other than needing to contact a funeral directors. After calling, Carina invited us into the Frimley branch for an informal chat and made us feel at ease straight away. She talked us through every step whilst being compassionate, caring and professional during the whole process. It was a difficult time that was made so much easier by the way Carina and Maria handled everything. When the Celebrant contacted us we were unsure of what we wanted for the service, with his knowledge and understanding he helped us to put together a service that was both relaxed, professional and perfectly suited to us. Thank you to the whole team!”

Sarah

“Thank you so much for the way you took care of Loui’s funeral for us. You really went the extra mile, we are really grateful for all your help with the arrangements with Louis and Mum.”

Sheila, Kenny & Family

“Lynn, Bruce and I thank you so much for the wonderful understanding and help you have given us over the past days.It has been a difficult time but made so much easier by your guidance. With your kindness, we feel we managed to say our goodbyes to ‘Roger’, ‘Dad’ and ‘Grandy’ – showing our love and thanks to him for looking after us so perfectly over the years.”

Pat Clark

“Thank you for all your kind attention during the funeral of my husband John on the 24th May. The arrangements were so efficiently and sympathetically handled that it lifted a huge burden from my shoulders. I enclose a cheque in favour of the Alzheimer’s Society in memory of my beloved John.”

Catherine Waterman

“Dear Beth,
Just a short note from all of us to say “Thank You” for all the effort that you applied to ensure that Sarah’s funeral passed so seamlessly.
If it can be described as a “Great Day” (which I know will sound odd) I mean it purely in terms of the balance between sadness and celebration was met – that also the weather was perfect, the co-ordination between service and committal was excellent, the flowers so beautiful and everyone played their part so well. It was largely down to you that it did work so well.
So a “Big Thank You”

Barry, Jemma, Matthew, Josie and William

“Thank you very much indeed for all your professionalism, support and guidance throughout the whole process involved in caring for my mother.
From the moment we met the staff at Holmwood Nursing Home until my collection of thank you notelets for my father to use I felt that everything was conducted in a most efficient and sensitive manner. I know that Clive spent a good deal of time with you and I was so pleased that we were able to have such a beautiful service very soon after the passing of our dear mother and wife. With thanks once again”

Jane Reg & Clive

“I cannot believe that a month has passed since we first met, the day after Brian died. Within a short time of our encounter, I know that an occasion I had always dreaded would be transformed into a positive, memorable occasion – and so it was!
Your warm and practical attitude, as well as highly professional advice, immediately instils confidence. Every detail of the proceedings is meticulously explained and I felt completely relaxed. Thank you Jess for making everything work so well. You are a remarkable lady with a definite vocation and I wish you all the very best for the future. I felt I found a real, new friend, just when I needed it most.”

Irene

“How can we say thank you for all you did to make Robert (Bob’s) funeral so lovely? We felt you worked so hard ,with your company and the Church to make everything so nice. So once again thank you.”