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Coping with Grief

Sadly, there is no one clear answer to the question “how do I cope with grief?” Everyone goes through their own process and deals with the death of a loved one in different ways. The most important thing is to be patient with yourself and others, and allow yourself to feel whatever it is you might be dealing with at any given time.

Coping with Initial Grief

You may have family and friends to help and support you at the time of death, who will also help you with the details and decisions of the funeral. However, there are many people who have no-one to help, in which case they can rely on their Funeral Director, minister, solicitor, or other professionals. Regardless of how many people you do or don’t have around to help, little can prepare you for the grief you may experience. Grief is a normal response to loss. It often brings pain, both physical and emotional. Shock, anger, guilt, regret, numbness and loneliness are some of the feelings which are common.

Coping with Grief after the Funeral

After the funeral, people often find it hard to try to return to their day to day life. The funeral is largely considered the final goodbye, a notion that many of the deceased’s nearest and dearest struggle with. If you are one who is finding it hard to move on, know that there is nothing wrong with this. In fact, long-term grief is common and there are always people experiencing something similar.

The Signs of Grief

Many people are affected physically by their bereavement. You may feel unwell and generally very tired and not wanting to be bothered by anybody or anything. On the other hand, some people cannot sit still and even become hyperactive. There are many other ways that grief can affect you. The important thing is to recognise that the emotional shock can produce a physical reaction. If you do have a recurring physical problem, do make an appointment to see your doctor.

Many bereaved people have ‘heard’ the voice of their loved one, or even believe they have seen them. Such experiences are not uncommon, but do not usually last for many weeks.

Strategies for Coping with Grief

Different people find different ways of managing their grief. Do not be afraid of crying or showing emotion. Tears are known to relieve emotional stress and there is nothing to be ashamed of; they are a demonstration of the feelings you have for the person you have lost. Allow yourself time to grieve and adjust to your new situation, and always take time before making major decisions such as moving house.

Talking in complete confidence with someone, who is trained in supporting bereaved people, can be very helpful. Having the reassurance that your fears and anxieties are quite normal has proved to be a comfort to many thousands of bereaved people.

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Coping with Grief

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We understand at this difficult time you need someone to guide you through it all. We’re on hand to help after someone you love dies.

Coping with Grief

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We’ll talk you through the process and what’s involved, so that you can make the right decision both for you and your loved ones.

Coping with Grief

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A Few Kind Words...

“I just wanted to drop you a line to say a massive thank you for everything you have done over the last two weeks. When I walked into Alan Greenwood’s on the 5th November I didn’t know where or how I was going to organise my lovely Mum’s funeral and the thought of it horrified me, you made a daunting job so much easier and were there to guide me all the way until the day of the funeral.”

I can’t thank you enough for your kind words, thoughts and help during this very difficult time. Losing someone as precious as mum is very hard but you helped so much. Thank you for everything you have done for mum, myself and my family.”

Sue, Mundy, Luke and Faye

“Would you please pass on our thanks to the young lady who conducted the burial of Joyce Ashby last week. She was so kind to Jean my very elderly cousin especially on the ride back in the Limo taking us through Richmond Park and chatting all the way. We then went on to have a family picnic in Jean’s garden in the sunshine a lovely way to remember Joyce and the perfect day for Jean. Very many thanks from all of us in North Wales.”

Sheila, Keith & Rhoada Ashby

“I would like to say a big thank you for everything. I had nothing to worry about, it all went so smoothly from the day of his death to the end of the funeral and in the circumstances could not have been better. Thank you so much.

I don’t have a great deal of experience in these matters, but compared to the other funeral directors I had to deal with, Greenwoods are the tops and you personally were a pleasure to deal with, you hit absolutely the right note.”

Ann Bishop

“The family would like to thank you and the whole team at Greenwood’s for your warm and professional service. We were delighted with your attention to detail and the relaxed but respectful manner of the Attendant and Bearers on the day itself. Many of our friends commented on the ‘dignity with lightness of touch’ and said it was one of the best-organised funerals they had attended. It was certainly a very different experience from my father’s funeral twelve years ago, and we shall recommend you wholeheartedly to others.”

Carole Day and Family

“We would like to thank you very much for looking after Mum and for all the arrangements you made for her funeral last Thursday. Your professionalism, help and ready advice together with your sensitivity at such a difficult time was much appreciated by us all. Our best regards.”

Nigel, Colin Ian & Coraine Ferguson

“Thank you very much indeed for all your professionalism, support and guidance throughout the whole process involved in caring for my mother.

From the moment we met the staff at Holmwood Nursing Home until my collection of thank you notelets for my father to use I felt that everything was conducted in a most efficient and sensitive manner. I know that Clive spent a good deal of time with you and I was so pleased that we were able to have such a beautiful service very soon after the passing of our dear mother and wife. With thanks once again”

Jane Reg & Clive

“I cannot believe that a month has passed since we first met, the day after Brian died. Within a short time of our encounter, I know that an occasion I had always dreaded would be transformed into a positive, memorable occasion – and so it was!

Your warm and practical attitude, as well as highly professional advice, immediately instils confidence. Every detail of the proceedings is meticulously explained and I felt completely relaxed. Thank you Jess for making everything work so well. You are a remarkable lady with a definite vocation and I wish you all the very best for the future. I felt I found a real, new friend, just when I needed it most.”

Irene

“As a family we cannot thank you enough for all your care and support of us on the passing of our mum – Peggy Hart on October 19th and her funeral on October 31st. As we know from the past, you do a wonderful job and all the staff are so caring and compassionate. Carol you are a rock (dare I say Star!) as you guided us through so much and helped keep us on track.

The day went off so smoothly and well. Mum looked good and would have so enjoyed her last ride in the jag! Also she would have been pleased at Alan leading the way, as Dad – Bill thought so highly of him and always spoke of him in glowing terms when he was alive and said he was a great guy to work with.

Thank you, thank you, what more can I say. I just wish you had offices in Canada so when my time comes, I know I would be in such excellent caring hands.”

Maggie & Mike Raftery

“How can we say thank you for all you did to make Robert (Bob’s) funeral so lovely? We felt you worked so hard ,with your company and the Church to make everything so nice. So once again thank you.”

Wendy Dennis & Brenda

“To all that it concerns, thank you seems hardly enough for making our Pops (William Hadaway) day very special with love and dignity from the beginning to the end you all made the day very special as well as his wishes you were there for all the family and made it a bit easier for us all to handle, couldn’t have wished for anything more. Many thanks again.”

Mark Hadaway & family

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